Like many of you out there I'm sure, New Years Eve and the turn of the clock is a time of reflection. I'm sad to see the end of another year, but super excited to see what is going to happen in the new one.
I've done a lot of reflecting already over the last few weeks. Hey, I've reflected loads this year. Its all part of my getting back to basics and getting to know who I am.
In previous years I have put together my top ten new year resolutions. There is something to be said for saying them out loud that makes them feel real. But this year I am taking a different approach...
Because this year has been a year for getting to know me, increasing my confidence and "can do" attitude, I'm looking back on my year and thinking about all things that I am proud to have achieved. And now, I'm excited to see what 2016 will bring for me.
This time last year, my husby said to me, "now listen, you've been treating this whole photography business as a bit of a hobby. It's been 12 months since you left your desk job, now I think it's about time you get serious about it".
That was the kick up the butt I needed. That one comment made me put my head down and take a step forward and get serious. But first....
I had to work on me. I know I can take pictures right, but I had to find the confidence to say it out loud and to say I had a small business. That's tough to say out loud and I still struggle a little, but I'm there! Admittedly I couldn't have done this withouth the wonderful Nikki Smith (Business Coach) and my ever growing support network.
Pre 2015, I hid behind my desk job. I didn't know how to organise my own life. I was great at my day job sitting behind my desk with my suit on. I just didn't know how to be confident outside of my place of work. Why would anyone want to read my posts, look at my photos or blogs right? But they do!
I am proud that I have put myself out there, spoken to complete strangers, initiated conversations and photographed some beautiful people all who I am proud to say are some of my amazing friends and followers.
One of my many reasons for pursuing my photography career was to spend more time with my children. To watch them develop and know what was going on in their life. Mid year I discovered I was there physically, but not emotionally. I thought because I was home more (even if I was working) I was there. But reality was..... I wasn't. With some little changes put into place, my kiddies, especially my eldest are now far more content.
I've learnt to let go of the past. To not hold onto things. It's easier said than done. When you say it out loud though, you are accountable. I've let go of a lot of the negativity and things that drain me in my life. There have been a lot of tears, but I feel so much more energised for it.
I no longer feel the need to fit in. This is tough to work through. I like to be liked. But who doesn't? Weirdly, this has made me feel more confident in who I am. I don't feel the need to impress anymore.
It's taken a bit to acccept the things I can not change. I've always thought maybe I could make situations better. I now know, sometimes you just can't.
And finally.... I am a good person and I can say that out loud. Those four little words are so powerful and to say that out loud is one of the biggest reasons I am looking forward to 2016. Because it brings me confidence.